I Surprise Myself

I got to The Dive and my table was occupied by a friend and his purse. He said it matched his shoes, he lied. His wife was doing whatever, I was quickly put in the corner when other people showed up. I'm claustrophibic, I sat in my corner and drank beer,and managed to get through 3 hours of OH SHIT I WANNA MOVE NOW AND I HATE IT HERE.
Mr. Asshole showed up during part of that, after everyone else left he and I threw some darts and actually sat down and had a conversation. I've obviously become more tolerant.
I couldn't stand him when I met him. Maybe we've both mellowed. I've been to The Asshole Residence a few times, but this is the most he and I have interacted. Yay me, but he's still an asshole.

I need to get out more

I came home and turned on The Kennedy Center Honors since there's nothing else on tv and I had shit to do anyway. I heard this woman singing, and I sat down on the couch and went Oh My Fucking God. I've never been an opera fan, but I may become one.

So Much For Irresponsibility

I went to work on time this morning because really? Annie was full of shit last night. I had shit to do, but got involved in other stuff that took all day, so glad I did show up. Now I just have more shit to do.

Grafton was good, but I hate it when the deadline is looming and they wrap up real quick. That's what it felt like anyway. All the meat was through the first 3 quarters, the last was rushed and tied up without much detail. I'll give it a C+.

I should change my sheets and put on some flannel since it's fucking cold, but I'm too lazy tonight. Maybe tomorrow.

Think I'll smoke and possibly take my ass to bed after I cover it in a few layers.
Night kids.

Sunday Suntimes

I got shit accomplished before leaving for The Dive to read for a bit. They got candy, I got laundry taken care of, it's all good.
Annie showed up. I gave her the paddle since she has the more fucked up family.
She came home, I threw darts with Andy, my new buddy who pushes me to throw better. I don't want to be his partner but that's beside the point.
I need to iron, but Annie pretty much told me I don't have to work tomorrow so.............I'm hanging out for the minute.
Sue Grafton finally has U out. I'm liking it immensely.
I think I'll get back to it since I don't have to be responsible tomorrow.
Night kids.

I Wondered what I Did to Piss off the Universe

Apparently it was this.
It was not an actual e-mail but a mash up from my days of online dating and some of the shit I get at work these days addressed to defunct addresses.

I thought it was funny, apparently some of you did too. It happens, trust me.
I paid for it today after Lucy was hours later getting here than she intended, we finally decided on dinner, they are closed until Jan 5, my store didn't have any of my smokes, and I had 3 blown lightbulbs when I got home. (Just glad something is getting blown.)

I'll be sure to add a disclaimer to any further (partially) made up shit so I don't get struck by lightning for it.

Back to our regularly scheduled bullshit.

Delayed Reactions

I Survived, now if I never see another Univ. of Alabama football helmet........oh shit. I guess I should move.

Now if we could just decipher the problem of me getting fat, eating like a horse and being late...........If I find a turkey baster Lucy is dead.

"Hey Spawn, you wanna box with Aunt Rain?" "YEAH!" Smack, thump, fetal position.
"I meant on the Wii kid."

Happy Chrismakwanifesiyule or whatever ya'll.

(No, there's no way I'm pregnant, unless I do turn up a turkey baster.) I'll be national news if I do.

Looking

Hellow, I'm 26 an bendy in all the rite places. call me if u wanna hook up.

Scary shit.

I want

My dart partner tonight was wearing that. I know it's very Un-PC, but so am I so I don't care.

Unexpected but pretty

I came home to find these on the porch. I was all ready to get WTF on Lucy, then remembered she usually sends shit to work.

These were from my new owners at work. Holy Shit.

Sunday was really lazy

Lucy cooked breakfast. It was excellent. I hung out in my jammies till late while doing laundry, since everything I owned was dirty. Finally showered and went to The Dive, mostly because I needed to get dog food cuz the kids were not gonna have dinner otherwise.
Sitting there, reading, I realized I hadn't brushed my teeth. Shit. How the hell does that happen? Fur coats on canines are not pretty no matter the context. I cashed out, came home and fixed that.
Now, I'm off to bed to grow a new fur coat.
Later kids.

Stupid Saturday

Lucy and I went to breakfast and then the grocery store. I'm not sure what the hell I was thinking when I said "Oh yeah, I'll go with you, I need to pick up a few things." I was one pissed off bitch by the time we left there. Thankfully we were meeting Annie and The Princess at The Dive after because I really needed a drink.
Annie and I got our asses handed to us a few times by Lucy and The Princess while throwing darts
The Assholes and The Widow and Boytoy were out, I thought Lucy was gonna rip Boytoy a new one for being a testosterone overloaded asshole. We left not long after he got on her nerves and before he could really get on mine.
We had some of these for dinner. Excellent if you add chilis and provolone.
Now Wizard of Oz is on and brownies are cooking. I think it might be an early night. Emogene just told me I need to cut my nails.
Later kids.

Friday night with a twist

Lucy and I met Ms. Sweet at the alternate Dive since there was the band at the regular place. We had fun, and it was mostly quiet, that's a good thing.
Came home and Lucy is giving me shit about Emogene since I brought her home for the weekend. She's jealous I'm liking another box. She doesn't get that Emogene has Windows 7, Lucy is hardwired to 1955.
I admit I was sitting here with Howard and his XP, and Emogene and her sleek new 7, and I had a bit of sensory overload. I'm writing this on Howard, but Emogene is calling me.....I think I'll wait till Lucy goes to sleep to sneak up and play.

Dirty Santa at The Dive

I didn't participate in that. The one guy was back, good music, and he leaves my table open so I can sit in the back of the place. I'm ok with that.
Mr. Asshole got a Snuggie, so that was worth a snicker, and Mrs. Asshole got a box of cheap wine. Glad I didn't waste a bottle of good booze on that mess.
I apparently hurt Annie's feelings since I don't give a shit about her problems with The Princess and she left early. Her loss.
I'm not terribly pleasant these days (I'm not a lot of the time actually) it's a miracle anyone likes me at all. I just don't have a problem with not having people around, I prefer not to. I guess I should try to understand the other side. Nah, they can just leave me alone, Spawn is picking my Nursing Home so fuck everybody else.

Weird and different

I went to The Dive after work to celebrate (after checking on Ms. Sweet's dogs since I didn't make it over there this morning). I moved from my perch when the League people started showing up simply because I'm not an asshole most of the time.
A guy who is there a lot came over and gave me money to play the jukebox. I told him I liked his music just fine, he said I played good music and he didn't know who a lot of them were, but would I?
I did, he came back a few songs in and said I played happy music, and people didn't like his stuff. I never had a problem with what he played.
Still made me feel good someone likes my taste.

It's A Girl!

Emogene Lucretia Wolf was delivered at 4:05 pm today weighing in at a svelte 6.3 lbs and 15.4". Isn't she beautiful?

So this is what's it's like to win the lottery...

It was Monday, I wasn't expecting much.
Turned out to be a balmy 55 and there was actually some sunshine this afternoon. I liked that.
Ms. Sweet called right before I left work to check on her dogs to tell me LS ate some of her vitamins this morning so "if he's sick or dead, that's why." Nice. He was fine, apparently the vitamins just made him hungry since he cleaned every food bowl she left out. He's a bit skittish, but came over to get his treat so hopefully we're all good there.
I went to The Dive after, grabbed the wrong book from the car but started reading it anyway since Mr. Mafia was hanging out and he gave me shit about my book yesterday.
You haven't met him yet, well coiffed, well jewelled gentleman who has recently started hanging around and we chat a bit. I decided the book was a keeper. I wasn't really into it when I started, so that worked out.
Annie showed up after her date, beat her ass at darts. My brother (who really isn't) came in right after that and beat her ass. She came home so I threw a couple of games with him, 1 and 1, but he paid my tab simply because he can.
I just got off the phone with Anonymous talking about our muses. Apparently mine left The Bahamas early, dumb bitch.
I think I'll go read some more of the keeper book and get to bed at a decent hour.
Night kids:)

This is for you Anonymous

Whatever Muse I had has left. I used to think I should write something every day whether I actally had something to say or not. I got nothing.
Sometimes it was funny, most times it was boring, lately it's not even worth logging in.
I haven't done much lately except read and drink. Meri Weiss is worth reading btw, she kept me up a couple of nights.
I'll try to pick up my personality tomorrow, it was getting cleaned. Maybe things will pick up from there.
Later.

So that explains that...

There's been a guy at The Dive. We threw some darts. Mine were bad. He mentioned people I knew from another place, I got it.
He's gay but not out, knew me from the other place I hung out, that explains his looking at me a lot (I've lost a lot of weight and hair since my nights there)

I wondered why he was around and checking me out.
I'm glad that's all resolved.

Bah Humbug kids.

Do I need a noseplug?

Annie called to see where I was earlier. I was throwing darts with a bartender. I'm up even tho he won the last. She didn't tell me I'd need to swim home. Jeep wasn't happy about that either.
It snowed over the weekend and thunderstorms tonight. I'm not sure who pissed off who, but I don't like it.
I'm glad Jeep and I are on a hill now just in case. We can always skate down when it freezes.
I had thoughts, but I'm cold, wet and tired, that just makes me more pissy than usual.
Later.

Last night's snow

That's actually a black table. It was all gone by 10 am.

Lucy's Bedtime Story

William, Henry and Horace were 3 little pigs thrown out into the world to make it on their own.
William built a straw house, he was an entrepeneur.
Henry built a twig house, he was an environmentalist.
Horace built a brick house, he was a lawyer. And then The Commodores took over my brain and I started singing She's a Brick House, Lucy peed the bed.

Dinner with Dad and the kids

We had a good time. Dad seemed anxious. The Grandson and I talked about it while we were out smoking. Apparently Skank was waiting for us to leave. That's fine, at least she wasn't there.
Saw new ultrasound pics of the new addition, she looks like The Grandson. That's cool since he didn't get his boy and the other daughter looks exactly like her mom. I don't see them nearly enough so we'll be making a date for after x-mess, she's due end of January.
In other news, it's snowing in Alabama. Think I'll go smoke again and go to bed.
Night kids.

Got not a thing

Today was quiet, that's good.
The Grandson sent me a couple of texts last night, apparently we're having dinner at Dad's tomorrow night since we didn't really do Thanksgiving. Grandson didn't want to miss the football game Saturday. Fine with me, I haven't seen his wife since she got really pregnant, and it's always nice to see them anyway, they're good kids.
Taking my ass to bed if I can keep my book from calling me to finish. Dammit.

In other news, Annie told me Purple Rain was on whatever channel. I actually turned over and semi-watched it. I wondered what the hell I was thinking when I went to the theater to see this movie, then realized I was 19. I still love Prince, but that movie sucked ass. Off to bed, night kids.

Happy Dances and shit

I was late to work today (Hello, no sleep, and then stayed up to finish book last night, and I know that's not an excuse but...) so. Slammed from the minute I walked in the door, and finally got a breathing moment. Caught up with someone about money since some needs to be available for purchases I'm supposed to be making. Not good.
Ta-daaaa Mail came. "Our" new credit card showed up, I ordered my new computer.
I then smoked a cigarette and changed my underwear.

I went to The Dive where I kicked some ass at darts, saw a new guy who is a one-man-band and stayed out too late for all that.
Of course I hooked up with the stranger, he didn't know the crowd, and is a bit more out there than I like, so I left while he was in the bathroom. I'm such a badass.

Hello Tuesday, I think I'm in a time warp

I woke up at 3:30 this morning (and didn't even need to pee) so I argued with myself for a bit. I could sleep some more and listen to women bitch all day, then stay late, or I could get up and fix shit and get it over with. It was 32 degrees according to the Weather Channel. Shit, piss, fuck, damn and hell.
I was making coffee and getting ready to climb a ladder at 4:30. Traffic is way lighter in the mornings.
My amnesiac is now happily ensconced with the family again so all is well and I didn't have to talk to anyone, even better.
The Good Wife isn't coming on tonight so I think I'll catch up on sleep. Later kids.

Ok, that didn't go so well. I had some green tomatoes from the plant Annie kept leaving on the porch until I finally threw it in a flower pot. It started bearing a few weeks ago, had 3 decent sized green tomatoes, and then it got cold. I pulled them a couple of days ago, and couldn't stand the thought of throwing them out. Fried green tomatoes and cornbread for dinner. Yummmm.
Now I'm debating calling Lucy to whine about Annie not getting my dirty jokes, or just taking my ass to bed.