Baby Got Back, kinda sorta

Today was probably the worst day of work I've ever had, and that's saying something. Part of it was Tylenol and Mucinex on coffee, OJ and Sundrop, but most of it was bullshit. I hid in my office as much as possible and counted the minutes.
I'm still not well is part of it too. I'm way too fucking sensitive right now.
I went to The Dive to get away, it was Karoke night. I didn't sing, but The Assholes showed up as did Lucy, and I danced. I got in a much better mood.
Then I came home, where Lucy was on the phone with my mom since she got here before I did, and Annie was just a wet blanket, and my headache from the awfulness increased tenfold. And I'm accused of having an attitude.
I give up.
I'm taking my headache, attitude and bullshit to bed and hope I don't wake up. I don't want to deal with this shit anymore.

I Should Pay More Attention

Bunches of stuff, so I'll hit the highlights, kinda sorta. Been stupid busy at work, took the weekend off to get a haircut and that turned into much drunkenness, not just mine. No bad, just drunk. Been playing too much at night for awhile so apparently that was my health's last hurrah for a little bit. Felt like shit Sunday, swore someone stomped all over me with hob-nailed boots. Apparently I was just getting sick. Gave up and came home Monday morning a bit after 9 to sleep all day, and sweat. Lucy is here so there was dinner, and more sleep, and more sweat. Hopefully behind me, we'll see. My head still hurts, but I did work and went out after where Annie and I wound up getting into it about work again because I know something I can't say and dammit, I'll have to fix that tomorrow. The person who told me never should have told me and it's killing me.
Yeah, I can get even more cryptic if you want, but there ya go for now.
New boss no longer sees me as his new toy, I'm in the pool with the rest of the castoffs now, and he's gone so I can't ask why since I was too sick to care yesterday. Just gonna try to muddle through till next week. I should already be in bed, but dammit I'm tired of it, and I need to change the sheets, but don't feel like it and hate to waste the effort. Maybe I'll sleeping bag on the couch tonight with Handsome, we haven't camped out in awhile.
Think I'll go check out that option. Night kids.

Well that was different

I was going to say Queen should never be included in a karaoke menu, but a couple of girls did them justice. There was some pretty awful singing, and some amazingly good singing. I refrained. I read and threw a few darts. This very attractive black man with a british accent was throwing next to me and dancing to all the songs for awhile. I asked him to play, but he was happy doing what he was doing so alrighty then. I did have to show him my 3 double bulls, that may be why he left. Oh well. The accent was cool, but would have gotten him only so far.
I came home and hit the bed, got up to cook just because. Fried potatoes with onins, hot pepper and hamburger. Threw it on a hamburger bun with some ketchup. Pretty good shit.
I need to sleep since I need to be at work early to start hell week all over again. I've worn a rut in the floor this week because I've been all over the damned place again. My new boss is.....I dunno. I don't like some things he's done, but he seems to like me so I'm going with that for now. I can make him laugh even if I can't so that's something.
Sleep. Night Kids.

Perimenopause

Apparently I has a raging case of it. I skipped occasionally, thought I was done, but Hell No, it came back with a vengence and brought all those hormones with it. I thought bleeding was supposed to relieve pressure, but I guess not, or maybe the not built up the hormones......I'm drunk I don't know shit.
I just know I was relatively stable for a couple of months while not having a period, when I decided to have one again it threw me into Screaming Shrew Bitch mode for a bit and now The Deepest Pits of Hell Depression. I wrote my suicide note the other night kinda depression. It's not pleasant.
I'd prefer to be funny, but it's hard to be funny when your ovaries are strangling your creativity and everything else in your life. So I've been quiet. Ok, I'm always quiet, but writing has always also been my outlet, and I haven't wanted to write. I haven't wanted to do a whole lot of anything except drink and sleep. It's not all that much fun.
I haven't been anywhere, I've been either working or sitting in a bar, or sleeping. Again, not all that pleasant.
Tonight I'm overtaking my ovaries and making an actual blog post. Damn them to Hell.
I think it's time to take my drunk ass to bed since I have to work tomorrow and if it's anything like the last couple of days? I'll be busy. Night kids.

Happy V.D. Kids

It was a Monday all freaking day. That's about the best that can be said for it. I'm going to bed.
Addendum, I remembered this and I'm better now. Course I'm crying, but better now. Night kids.

Gnomes and Gossip

Gnome 2 kept talking about "this cute little thing" she works with. Apparently he worked where I do at some point, I don't know him. Lucy and I laughed because "he's a cute little thing" came up several times. It was funny.
Lucy and I wound up at Offal House since I haven't eaten this week and I may never eat again now.
I lost my train, I think I'll just go to bed. Night kids.

Frustration Cessation

Yeah, it's been awhile again because things have been stupid and so have I.
I spent most of my afternoon trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole because the new boss heard I couldn't do it. He didn't know it was a square peg and a round hole, but he will tomorrow.
The square peg will be firmly implanted in someone's round hole before I leave tomorrow, under armed guard or not.
New Boss is ok, but old assholes and demands on my time are confusing him and me and causing me more problems. We'll be fixing some shit.
Later kids.

Yep, Monday Again

Kinda sorta watched that ballgame yesterday at The Asshole's house with some other people and a bunch of food. Lucy was designated driver so that was cool. Annie was fried by the time we got there and our Host and Hostess weren't far behind. It was still a good time. I didn't expect to last past halftime, but we stayed till it was over. I picked the winning team even tho I didn't give a shit, threw away some money on squares and pretty much just hung out. That works for me.
Went to The Dive to read after work today (where I hid as much as possible since the bosses are in town again), threw a few darts with My Brother Who Really Isn't, he paid my tab, so now I'm home washing clothes. The only dress pants I had clean this morning are too big so I had to wash the shit that actually fits. I think that'll be the extent of my evening. Dry clothes and put them away and put my ass in bed. We're getting snow talk again. Today went from 52 to 30 pretty quickly and it's just gonna get colder tomorrow, so I need to check the sweater situation also.
Later kids.

Karoke, or something like that, there was singing

Mrs. Asshole can sing. My server/bartender can sing. Other People, some good, and not so much. Mrs. Asshole did "Sweet Transvestite" with me. I just provided sound effects. Heh.
Drunk. B&B is not my friend if I'm gonn be lucid. Ok, I'm not as drunk as I play to be. Karoke wasn't the huge fail I expected it to be, so good for The Owner. I'll bring a Cher wig next time he wants to do that song.

Off to bed.

I think I should be scared

Had meeting with new boss today. I thought it went ok. Annie called me later and it sounds like hers didn't go so well. I only got the highlights, and no, didn't sound good at all. She came home while I was out drinking with my brother who isn't. Apparently I hit my beer curve after he left. I still had beer so I threw a few darts. Triple single on every fucking one. Just couldn't hit a bullseye. Glad I only play for fun.
Handsome was happily having a mudbath while I was out grilling pork chops so I came in and gave him a bath because really? He was chocolate covered. His mom will either chew me out or thank me in the morning. She didn't see him, so thanks would be in order.
He's snoozing on the loveseat in front of the heater and I'm taking my ass to bed, in a minute.

Facebook post I made earlier, makes perfect sense to me, but does it to you?
The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. I guess I'll quit following the yellow brick one since it's paved with lies.

I think someone took that as political or something. Not at all what I meant.

Yep, time for clean sheets and sleep. Later kids.

Hello Monday and Goodbye Money

The Jeep hasn't been feeling well. Thankfully I had an income tax return since the Jeep ate it all today. Not complaining, it's a good cause. Jeep and I have an agreement that I'm going to drive him until he can't drive anymore. A little of this and a little of that to help us along are fine with both of us. I would say it was a bad time, but no, at least I had the funds so it was a good time.
He's tail-wagging again and I'm good with that.
I left work early to pick him up since Annie was my ride because she wouldn't let me just sit there to wait all day, and she had shit to do so.......I hit The Dive rather than going back to work which may have been a mistake.
The new boss is here, along with my former boss I didn't know was my boss, and yeah. I have an e-mail about a meeting tomorrow that is gonna cause me to trash the new douchebag who had me running last week so it may be a good thing I have a functional vehicle lol.
I think I'll go check out my clean sheets. Night kids.

Yes, I've been busy

This week has been hell at work, after hasn't been much better.
Lucy and I came in last night and watched "Boys Night Out" just because we could. I've been in movie mode at night lately too. I think Friday was The Philadelphia Story again. Gotta love Cary and Kat.
Stupdity is running rampant again and it's not just mine so I'm just trying to lie low and sleep since Armageddon is coming.
Guess I'll do some more laundry and put my ass in bed. Night kids.

Snow People Lied and everything else

There wasn't even a dust. Damn weather people.At least the kids got to sleep late since they delayed schoools yesterday in anticipation. Heh.
I don't know what rice Annie cooked, but it's not bad at all.
I was out drinking with My Brother and Mr. Cool.

I wanted to title this "Today Was Like Getting Teabagged By a Hobo" but snow took over.
My days are off. I have to remind me today isn't Thursday. I'm so fucked up I can't remember shit anymore. And not fucked up in the good way.

I worked all day on one thing.......that wasn't really my thing to start with, so I'm gonna be pissed if Asshole claims it. And one of us will get fired before it's over.

I realized on the way home that I didn't smoke for a long time while MR. Cool and I were talking. He quit, and I try to be courteous, but it could also be talking to him is fun. I had a cigarette then.
Home, gonna call Lucy and put my ass in bed where it belongs because Annie was calling to make sure I could drive not too long ago. Nice of her since she's a sleazy ho who stayed home tonight.

Gonna Snow Again

WTF? I live in the South for a reason. It's hot, humid, stupid and more often than not backwards thinking, but Comeon. It's snowed more the last few months than it has in my lifetime.
I'm not a happy camper about that. I'll let you know tomorrow how much we get since the weather dudes are hedging their bets. 1-5 is the last I heard. I may have to get up at 3 to see if it's actually doing anything.
I think I'll go put my ass in bed just so I can.
Night kids.

Monday, Monday

Mamas and Papa's didn't get that quite right. Mondays suck. I worked, which didn't help my head any. Hit the bookstore since I had nothing new to read, threw some darts, came home and ironed almost everything while watching Some Like It Hot. Good movie anyway. Finishing that up so I can put my ass in bed. I should have changed sheets since I woke up sweaty, but I was too lazy.
Got up at 2 to help Annie pick up The Handsome Devil because he's having issues with the floors, and his legs. Finished off my back I think.
Handsome is another sore spot, he's got quality still, but issues, and I thought he'd had a stroke this morning, and I'm really not ready for all that.
Yeah, I'll take my ray of sunshine and go to bed. Night kids.

And Fun Was Had

I think. I woke up today with a pounding headache so I assumed it was a hangover from too much fun yesterday. I don't think so anymore since nothing has fazed it. That means either I'm getting sick or I'm hormonal and neither is a good option right now.
Dad called this afternoon to check in and ask how I felt about him seeing Annie, specifically should he back off. And I don't know. I haven't talked to her, but I think she was a bit freaked out that he was serious. They've always kind of flirted with each other, and I think she was ok with that but not so much the reality of getting together. I'll see if she'll talk to me about it tomorrow. He asked how our "chat" went, and I didn't tell him we didn't have one so...... I guess she told him she'd talk to me or something. After he came home with us, I went outside and talked to Lucy while they held hands on the loveseat so I'm not sure what else went on.
Yeah, I'm a little skeeved at the idea. Ok, a lot skeeved. Hopefully it won't go anywhere.
I need to smoke and go to bed since my head is still killing me and I've got to be all functional and shit tomorrow.
Later kids.

HOLY FUCKINGSHIT

My Dad showed up at the birthday party today. I invited him on a whim....everyone loves him.
He may be dating Annie too, they were on the loveseat way too much for me, after he asked me if it was ok if he asked her out. I'm all stupid dramaqueen head now.

Yeah, I think I'll sleep.

Isn't She Lovely

Stevie Wonder, good song. It's on, so there you go.

not so lovely post.

I had a good night, beat up on Ms. Sweet a few games. I owed her.
The Owner and a couple of his friends came back to throw a dart to decide who would buy the next round.
One guy is a huge asshole already, and cemented it when he told the others "I don't throw with queers."
After he'd lost 3 rounds. ASSHOLE.
Just pissed me off royally since he's made other comments about the "Queer Corner" (meaning my spot) where most everyone else is straight. And I heard about it from someone else because he's too much of a pussy to say anything to me.

For the most part The Dive is cool, but there will always be the Neanderthals I guess. Assholes.

For the most part The World is cool, but there will always be the Neanderthals I guess. Assholes.

Perspective, I live in my corner and don't bother you, so leave me alone.

A Night At The Dive and Stuff

It was pretty slow, I stopped in to read like I normally do. I got bored and played some music. The next time I went to the bar to get a beer people were handing me money and buying me beers to play some more music. I guess they were bored too. I played a bunch that were apparently well received, had a couple of free beers and brought my ass home since it's snowing again. The Dive DJ, heh, I'll put that on my business cards.

Last night was Mr. Asshole's birthday and there was way too much drinking and carrying on. I was late to work today because I went back to sleep after getting up at 6 which was a big mistake. I should probably eat, but it's late so I guess I'll check in with Lucy and put my ass in bed so I can check on the roads early in the morning. Yes, it's snowing, but the roads are just wet and it's going to get frigid tonight. Later kids.

This Is Why Lucy Got Mad

I looked like this when I went to work yesterday and The Boss told me I looked really good. Lucy had a coniption when I sent her a text to tell her. Yes, I know, she told me multiple times what a bitch I am, but it was worth it.

I need to put my non-existent ass in bed since I stayed out way too late last night and didn't get my much needed beauty sleep. The boss will still be here tomorrow.

Lucy's Going To The Nuthouse (and blames me)

I sent Lucy a text this morning that the boss told me how hot I looked. She got a phone call in the midst of the texting where she was repeatedly calling me a bad name. She said "I can't believe you have the tits to call me after what you said, Rain".
A voice says, "I'm not Rain."
Lucy lost it when she realized it was the Shrink's office. I think she'll be doing time soon.
She has been the most entertainment I've had today. She and several other people got on Facebook where she tried to trash me, and got reprimanded pretty quickly by my camp.
She'll be bringing stairs so she can kick me in the ass Friday. At least I got friends in high places. She'll need bigger stairs.

*Lucy was not hurt in the process of writing this post. I was talking to her at the time and got called several bad names while doing so, but got her blessing to post. She'll regret it later I'm sure.

Strange and Strange

I went to my first Catholic church today. Lucy did the things, I didn't know any better, and apparently neither did anyone else.
It was cool, they talked about my friend as a person, and apparently his ashes have been anointed so he's cool with the afterlife. So they say.....
I hope the next time I hit the wall and want to go there, I'll remember Mark, and how pissed off I am at him for leaving. And how I'd love to hear his laughter one more time. His Sister talked about his singing in the Eulogy. Talking to him was one thing, his singing voice was totally different. You didn't expect that from the guy who asked "Can I get you anything else."
He was just a regular guy, and he'd goof around to make you laugh.
I made Lucy listen to his CD at one point. She didnt' think it was really him. He had a gift. He had a voice. He also had a heart. He was, and always will be one of my favorite people.

Nothing to Add

Been busy, been drunk, don't see an end to either anytime soon. Just started wrapping my head around the idea that I'm one of the big dogs at work when I find out Annie and I are getting a new boss. The boys want to spend less time here. Kinda scary, but I think I'll be ok. She's a bit freaked out, but I think she'll be ok too as long as she doesn't get stupid. Or more stupid at least.
Worked for awhile today, threw a couple of games of darts and came home at a decent hour. Probably sleeping soon too. I'm boring.
Memorial service for Mark is tomorrow, I'm dreading it, but hopefully they'll at least have his urn there so I can cuss him out.
Mrs. Asshole's cat is sick and she asked if I'd show up if she called. Yes, I will. Didn't tell her Babysis called this morning, she had to put her cat down. It's been a bummer of a few days.
I think I'll go have another beer and put my ass in bed. Night kids.

No More Bling

Apparently I can't wear jewelry anymore. I was sick after losing my elephant ring that Mom gave me, then last week I broke my necklace with me and Spawn. Today I realized my wedding ring was missing. And no, I didn't accidentally take it off which I'd hoped happened. It wasn't really MY wedding ring, I bought it about 20 yrs ago, wore it on my middle finger, and wore it all the time. Now it's gone too. Dammit. Damn cold fingers, Damn weight loss, Damn everything. Dammit.

Out Of The Loop

I knew when I saw the name on my phone that it wasn't good. He and I haven't seen each other in well over a year. I let it go to voicemail, partly because of that, and partly because I was busy. Obviously we've kept each other's numbers tho, so there's something.
I finally listened to the message and yes, it was bad. Someone I used to know committed suicide over the weekend. Dammit.
He was a bartender (duh) also a friend. I knew him for years and years. I guess I just lost touch with a lot of people and he was one of them.
At one time, I was one of his groupies. He played drums and sang, I showed up several times at several places to see and hear him. He was one of the good guys, with faults. He'd been with the same woman for years, then I guess he got a crisis or something. He left her, hooked up with some young thing and pretty much fucked things up. I was there through all that, saw him get his shit back together and take care of the first girlfriend when she got cancer and died, and got his shit back together period. It's been several years, but we caught up not long ago on that face place. He seemed like the old guy, always upbeat and fun. He used to try to change my mind about Lucy, jokingly.
I have no idea what happened, but it makes my heart hurt that it did, and apparently hardly anyone knows.
I've got a cd he made, I started to listen to it today but I didn't want to cry in my fishbowl so I'll save it for later.
Goodnight Mark. I'm glad I knew you and I'm sorry.

That's Kinda Scary

I was talking to Lucy on the phone when I heard Annie get up. We were talking about Spawn, I made the comment "He'll either be a genius or a serial killer" and Annie poked her head around the door to ask if I was talking about my nephew.
Hopefully he'll just be me. Smart enough to hide the tendencies, and the bodies.

Been A Shovelling Fool

I won't be able to move tomorrow. I did the sidewalk at home, part of the driveway, then had to go to work to chase Annie down since I thought she was going around the block, but nooooo, she went riding around. Her vehicle is massive, but no 4 wheel drive. Following in her tire tracks (because she's an idiot) I had to switch to 4 wheel and still skidded around a bit. Anyway, did some more shovelling at work just in case. Came home, piled up in the Jeep and went to The Dive, which was closed, so we crashed The Asshole's house just because we could. After a few glasses of wine Annie was shitfaced but we went to The Dive anyway because they did open for the football game. Didn't take long there to kick her ass at some darts and home again. I finished shovelling the driveway then since I had to go back to 4 wheel to back up the driveway and it's supposed to be 20 something tonight. Don't want to slide off the hill in the morning in case I actually have to go to work.
Watched the ballgame, kinda sorta, my team won :) Also got a message that I won some money, so even better.
Found the secret to keeping me warm. Polypropylene long johns and top, jeans, ski pants and silk undershirt. I'm toasty.
Think I need to put my toasty ass in bed with some ice and more ibuprofen. Night kids.

It Was Pretty For A Second

It's snowing. Hard. I was outside and swore I saw lightning since everything lit up. Then it thundered, so no, I'm not crazy. That was awesome. I waited around for some more, but that was it, move along now.
Addendum. Apparently the thunder snow is a big deal, it did happen again later when I was out looking for my phone. I found it in a pile of snow in the backyard. Hearing "Play That Funky Music" from a snowball is also a new experience.
I need to get to bed now. Later kids.

I'm Up Past My Bedtime

Apparently I've gotten old, I'm usually asleep by now. Tonight I'm up since Lucy is on my couch showing The Handsome Devil inappropriate movies. I'll have to go get my cane.
I had my ass handed to me by a 12 yr old at the bar earlier. I beat him once, but he got me next game so he was all happy. When I told Lucy "He's a nice, well mannered young man" I almost went to the bathroom to hang myself. Really? That sounded so Miss Marple-ish.
I give up. Lucy and Handsome can have their scary, skin, whatever the fuck it is they're watching. I'm going to bed.
Night kids.

Lucy, DON'T read this

Yeah right.
I was out with the usual suspects tonight. Mrs. Asshole was giving Mr. Cool shit about his wife. Not publicly, but after the wife left she was talking to him. Yes, we all agree the wife is not all that and Mr. Cool is, but it's his life. That's pretty much what I told him after The Assholes left. As long as he's happy, I don't care. (I don't care too much anyway, but he is kind of a friend so.)
We had a conversation. This is where I would tell Lucy again not to read, but she already knows so...
He said the advice he got from his father was to make sure she loves you more than you love her. So far that's working for him. And of course got me to thinking which is never a good thing...
I've given my heart away twice. The first time I was too young and stupid to realize what was up. The second time I was still young and stupid and by the time I realized where my heart was, I had already fucked it all up.

Lucy loves me more than I love her. We both know that. That's probably why she's been here for 10 years. Maybe Mr. Cool's advice works, we can deal this way. I dunno.

HAHAHAHAHA

I need to photoshop my horns onto that pic.

So I May Get Myself Outed

Sadie is not doing well. I'm even praying at this point and that's not my strong suit. They've tried 3 times so far to start dialysis but the port keeps clotting up. Her mom says as of this morning she's gained 30 lbs, all fluid. Thanks for all that you have done, and please do some more.

So Annie needed some help with some pussy...

I'll start there and work backwards. Annie was knocking on my bedroom door this morning because there was a cat in the tree in the backyard. Actually, there were 2 of them, but anyway. Neighbors cats seem to have gotten stupid and came over here, Annie said all 3 dogs were lying around the tree, apparently just waiting.
Put up the dogs, Lucy talked kitties down, they then proceeded to come back to the fence to taunt the dogs so they're on their own now.
The kids, Lucy and I showed up at Dad's for dinner yesterday. It was our X-mess since Step-Nephew had to work that weekend. Dad cooked and I ate more at lunch yesterday than I've eaten in a month. It was amazing that I could fit that much in. I then had some ice cream just because.
Lucy and I left, headed off to the beer store way down the road because Dad lives in a dry county. Blue lights everywhere, I pulled into the store to go around thinking it was an accident. Nope, roadblock. "No Ossifer, we haven't been drinking, just came down here to the store before heading home." "You drove all the way from yourtown to come to the store?" "HUH? Noooo." Long story short, he had a sense of humor and no, we hadn't been drinking, so turned around and came home before I did get in trouble.
Dragged Lucy to Ms. Sweet's house today so I could look at her computer yet again, good things were 1. Ms. Sweet was out with the family, told me to go on in and do my thing and 2. Take all that beer she had stockpiled for me because she's not planning to travel again for a few months.
I'm home with about 3 cases of beer sitting in the utility room where it will stay cool so I'm good for a bit.
Lucy went home, I hit The Dive for some reading. Bought some new darts that I'm still messing with since they don't like my baby flights, but I beat Annie's ass with them so they may do.
Made cornbread and dragged some peas out of the freezer that needed to be cooked so belly is full again and I think I'll go get some sleep since I have to rejoin the real world tomorrow.
Later kids.

Another Conversation With Lucy

(Discussing Dad and his women)
Me: Maybe he just wants to take everybody for a test drive.
Lucy: We are not automobiles (said very sternly).
Me: I can make your motor purr.
Lucy: CHOKE, HACK, LAUGH, fall on floor.

When she could breathe she agreed with me.

Some New Year's Eve Stupidity

Why It Doesn't Pay to be Nice

I'm home. I got stupid earlier, then brought my ass home. Lucy volunteered to drive Annie and The Princess around tonight. It's raining like hell. Poor Lucy.
I'm putting my ass in bed. Later kids.

Happy New Year

Getting this in early since I don't have a clue what I'm doing later.
Mom is in the hospital and I spent last night there with her. Short of breath and heart rate going all crazy but they can't find a cause. Possibly a chemo reaction, I dunno. Got home early this morning and slept a couple of hours before coming to work. Waiting to hear if she'll get to go home today or not.
Supposed to go to Dad's tonight, but that's looking doubtful so at the moment my plan is to hit The Dive for a bit and get to bed at a reasonable hour since there will be running around tomorrow.
Anyways, hope y'all have fun and may we all have a happy, prosperous 2011 with a whole lot less drama :)

I'm in Trouble

Like that's new.
I worked late after going in late so it's all good.
I stayed out late with Mr. Cool tonight. He ragged on Gnome1 so she's upset, we shared some obscure musical tastes and bonded. He's a cool guy.
I had shit to share, but damn if I can remember what it was.

Oh yeah, Bedroom Aerobics Alone. I put Vick's on my feet last night since I still can't breathe. Socks, washed hands, blissfully snoozing until whatever time this morning, can breathe. Got up, looked in mirror, WTH is that?
Apparently I was doing aerobics in my sleep, Vick's in my hair. I wonder now what I was dreaming about and how I got my ankles that high. May be why my back hurts. Sleep Aerobics, must make a tape for that, I could make millions.

How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it.

Yeah, I should put my ass in bed. Night kids.

Lucy Called Me A Slut

My Brother (Who Really Isn't) paid my tab before he left. After a couple of hours of darts, where we had had some really good games, his friend he left me with paid my other tab. So I'm a slut because 2 men paid for my drinks and company this evening.
Lucy is so old fashioned.

Cencorship and HAHAHA

I've been doing a lot of that with my language lately. Ok, more than usual. I always censored around Mom, no cussing unless it was needed, and I'm a potty mouth so there was a lot of it.
Once Spawn got here, I toned down, now that he's old enough to repeat me, oh hell no.
Work has been the final challenge. My new wardrobe and responsibilities lead me to say "That is unaccepatable" rather than "That's fucking bullshit." I find my new favorite word is "Crap" rather than "Fuck". It's probably a positive change, but I've always embraced my use of foul language, and now it's languishing by the roadside in a puddle of slush. Sigh.
It's hell to become an adult at 45.

In other news, My Brother (Who Really Isn't) showed up with his friend tonight and after MB(WRI) left, we threw some pretty good darts. I hit the beer curve about then I guess. I had fun.
Rome is falling around me, but I've been in a better mood the last few weeks than I've seen in a long time, I dunno either. I've still got the crud, probably pneumonia since my lungs hurt, but my brain is happy. Another WTF I know.
I think it reinforces the theory that I'm seriously disturbed.
At this moment I'll roll with it. Tomorrow I may be too far in the dumps to give a crap. Hehe.
I need to call Lucy so we can discuss the latest CRAP, and put my ass in bed since my week got fucked up today with the news that I have to work Friday. I meant crapped up, but anyway.
Later kids.

So a Boob Falls Out of A Bra...

X-mess Eve. I'm getting ready to get out of town since Mom wouldn't let me miss the holiday sick or not. Last minute stop on the way out of town for smokes just in case I got stuck and I'm sitting at the stoplight wearing a leather jacket. Jeep is warm and day wasn't too frigid so I take the jacket off and hang it over the back of the passenger seat.
Apparently when you lose weight, only wear sports bras in the first place, and haven't bought any smaller ones lately, things get a little loose.
The left crepe slipped halfway out the bottom of the bra.
That was not exactly comfortable and there were cars around so I drive for a bit waiting for traffic to thin out before reaching down my shirt and grabbing the wayward tit.
Of course there was suddenly traffic, so I got a couple of looks.
I made a comment somewhere that all my bar friends saw, so it's been all about the tit today. Bastids.

Merry X-mess and Holy Crap!

According to the local news stations, this is the first time we've really had a White X-mess since 1969. Thankfully it warmed up enough for me to get home, since this was at Babysis' house early this morning.
We had a good time and Mom was feeling pretty good so YAY! WTH, I give you Viking Spawn also.

It's appropriate those look more like bull horns since he's turning out to be more stubborn than me and his mom put together, and let me tell ya, that's pretty damned stubborn.
Off to check in with The Princess and probably decide to just stay in since I'm here.
Later kids.

So a Drunk Walks Into A Wall

Apparently I had a touch too much holiday cheer last evening. I blame it on Mr. Cool and the shot of tequila he bought me on his way out the door. Or the plethora of beer I was drinking to alleviate the coughing. Most probably the soup I had for lunch Tuesday and pretty much nothing since played into it. Yeah, I'm a lightweight all over these days.
Annie informs me there was a "boom" last night, which was apparently me running into something. At least I'm not beat up, so yay. I'm just fuzzy to non-existent on getting into bed, that hasn't happened in a long time. Probably a good thing I'll be in Armpit with the family tomorrow and Saturday.
Got up to go to work, fuck it, slept a little longer and went in at 10. Best sleep I've had in a week too so there ya go.
Off to check in with Lucy (the greatest g/f in the world because she went shopping for me today) and put my ass in the bed so I can take care of business tomorrow and get my ass to Armpit.
Merry X-mess, alltheotherstuff, and goodnight kids.

Handsome and I had A Conversation

And I just realized how superfluous I am. Fuck.
I have 3000 things on this computer that don't matter to me. And I'm sitting here instead of talking to someone or petting Handsome. Yeah. Fuck that.

And That's Another Thing...

Got a call from Babysis last night. Sadie's mom really wanted to get this gift for her but couldn't find it, apparently it's a hot item. I have no clue since Lucy does my shopping. Told her I'd help out if there was anything I could do, but again, clueless.
Babysis called at 6 something this morning after I'd pretty much decided to stay in bed all day. Toy store close to me had 9 in stock at 6 a.m. but wouldn't hold one.
Got out of bed and put on my cape. Sadie has what she wanted for X-mess. If they had 9, then yeah, they're hot, there were 6 when I got there at 7:30. Met Sadie's Mom after work to give it to her so all good.
My heart feels good even tho the rest of me feels like hammered shit (thanks for the term Granny).

Going to check in with Lucy and put my ass in bed where it belongs. Night kids.

Almost forgot. No, I'm not a Saint. Sadie's Mom is paying for the gift. I just needed to pick it up and I saved her a trip and some consternation over it. Brainaddled also it seems. I'll give you an update on her later. Right now she's doing pretty good, which is way better than last week.

Some Good News

Mom's scan was good. Tumors are pretty much gone. He wants to do 2 more treatments to make sure, but so far so good. Fingers crossed, and thank you.

I'm going to put my sick ass in bed since I managed to burn all my fingertips heating up ribs and I've gotta be well enough to be around the cancer patient for X-mess.
Night kids.

Potato Soup and Vick's

That's Mom's recipe for curing whatever ails you. Gotta make some soup with lots of oinins and rub some Vick's on your chest. Or feet, since that's been suggested several times and when I actually tried it, it seemed to work.
I don't have any potatoes, but I'll be trying the other because I seem to be getting sick. That's not good. I don't want to go home sick, especially if Mom has to have another treatment. Even if I stay at Babysis' house, anything I might cook will be tainted with me germs and I don't want to be responsible for making her sick.
I should go put my ass in bed since it's been a day.
Later kids.

Some More Stuff

I went to The Asshole's house where there was some game playing and lots of drinking. Thankfully Lucy was driving. I'm losing my voice, either from smoking or vocalizing while playing games, doesn't matter. Could be from x rated activities Lucy doesn't want you to know about, but I didn't say that.
I think I'll put my ass in bed. Night kids.

So There's This and That

I took Mom for her scan yesterday. She wasn't feeling well and 2 hours later she really wasn't feeling well so I got her some lunch and took her home. She pretty much threw me out after that which was ok. Get results Monday, and find out why she's scheduled for another Chemo treatment she didn't know about so...
I got home too late to go to work so I hit The Dive and hung out. Thought I was supposed to go to Ms. Sweet's to dogsit, didn't, turns out it's a good thing. She didn't travel. Got a text today about throwing darts (after I packed a bag and everything to go over there after work), didn't tell her I almost gave us both a heart attack last night.
Darts were thrown, most of mine badly. The Gnomes beat me 2 games.
I'm home watching The Wizard of Oz and happy about it. There may be early afternoon drinking at the Asshole's house tomorrow so I'm saving up.
Later kids.

So a Cricket Walks into a Bar

Yeah, I dunno. I got to work this morning, possibly still inebriated from last night and there was shit to do. And people to see, and meetings to attend........and Dammit.
I managed.
We got an Ice day, everyone left at 3:30 because of the weather. Yeah, it's warming up tonight, tomorrow will be 50 something.
I was supposed to go to Armpit but begged off because of roads and idiots, so I'll be travelling early in the morning. I guess I should put my ass in bed because it is tired. Later kids.

The Dive and Candy and stuff

Yeah, I think I got drunk. There was dancing at The Dive, and obviously mucn drinking.
Lucy said I should hang out an I'll be back tommorow sign.
She's probanbly right.
Putting my ass in bed.
Night kids.

Home For A Change

Feels like I haven't been home for a weekend in forever. I got up early yesterday, then decided I didn't have to be, so I slept really late. Did some running around, hit grocery store and made beef stew. I over salted. That never, ever happens since I don't really eat salt. I put some in because I should, but apparently got carried away with it. Doctored it later, it's better today. I also hit the bed at 10:00 on a Saturday night so I guess Hell really has frozen over.
I was up at way too early today, went back to bed, but my back hurt so that didn't stick. Did some running around, found the last thing I needed for candy without having to go to Wal-Hell and came home and made bunches of goodies. Took most of that to The Dive because I like them much better than those bitches I work with. A-hem.
ANYway. Annie and I threw a few darts, she left, I'm getting ready to leave. Ms. Sweet calls to see if I'm there so she comes out to eat and yada yada yada, pays my tab since I'm possibly housesitting for her later this week. I should pay her for that, but anyway. Home, facebooking and being stupid and probably going to bed soon again. Wii is broken so I can't do anything and I don't like it. Night kids.

Band........bad

I usually like bands, I was a groupie once. Once. The one at The Dive gets on my nerves because they take over and yadda yadda yadda.
I went to The Asshole's house for a bit. We had fun, I tried to sneak out, got caught, but it was ok.
We played with the Kinect while I was there, Jeeebus I suck at bowling. Trying to get them to really bowl sometime, other people were there who also voted for that, so maybe. I need to get my balls out of storage {heh}.
I need to put my ass in bed, there is a flannel cocoon waiting for me, and my non-existent ass. Cocoon.........yeah. Later kids. I can sleep late tomorrow.

Blame It On Granny

She wanted to see a picture of my non-existent ass. Yes, that's it, not my front as Lucy thought when I showed it to her at lunch.



*Disclaimer:Any retinal damage caused by looking at this image is entirely the fault of Jackiesue Denney aka Yellowdog Granny. Please direct all complaints, lawsuits, or offers of fake buttocks to her. Thank You.

Huh, Who Knew?

A friend/waitress/bartender at The Dive wrote this about me.

You make bitching funny. But no matter how I've messed up, you've never actually bitched at me. I like that! What may seem like small kindnesses to you (saying thank you, laughing at my stupid jokes, listening to my never-ending list of grievances, or dropping me a GaGa song) can really make a crappy day turn around.
I could listen to you making fun of people all day, your wit is so sharp and hilarious! I think you're a badass, because you don't care what anybody thinks, you're always genuine, and if there's ever a need to "throw down", I'm on your team!

She worked tonight, we did not speak of it. It's funny, she's usually very blase' about things, as I think I am, but yeah, she was giggling the other night when I was dancing.
Of course I paid her for the endorsement.

Depends on The Day

Woke up at 4 to pee, snoozed off and on till 5. Handsome was outside my door scratching, Betty was outside my window barking. Went to smoke to try to reason with Betty and every dog in the neighborhood was involved in this conversation, so since I couldn't fault them for facebooking, I went to work.
I just hope she didn't post a pic of me in my Scooby Doo jammies.
Annie left a sweater in my room at some point. I wore it today over a real shirt, looking all preppy and shit, just to try to keep myself warm. It shat all over everything I got close to. We'll have a chat about hand-me-downs later. The only good thing was it made me look like I actually had an ass. Looks can be deceiving.
Read at The Dive for a bit, scared the regulars by joining them at the bar because Dart League showed up, came home to do some laundry and hurt Mom's feelings. I've been on a roll.
I think it's time to whine to Lucy and put my ass in bed before I cause anymore damage. Night kids.

Fraught with Ills, but not insurmountable

It wasn't horrible for a Monday. Problems, yes, but not the usual I run my ass off putting out fires, so yay. This will probably bite me in the ass tomorrow. Whatever.
I need to go to bed, it's frigid around here and I've gotta plan some clothes for tomorrow so I don't freeze my tatas off.
Night kids.

Apparently Hell Froze Over

I left work Friday and went to Wal-Hell all on my own. I needed jeans. The last one's I bought were smaller, but still too big so I went down another size. Still too big, but better. I was there about 10 minutes and most of that was in the parking lot. Damn people. Lucy nearly fell out when I told her I went there, and actually had an unsolicited conversation with a stranger. Strange days indeed.
Got to The Dive and got drunk. Lucy almost beat me at darts. She then brought me home and wound up talking to Brooklyn most of the night while I was passed out. Brooklyn will be getting a chat from me soon. The Jeep probably thinks The Dive is it's new home, it's been there a lot lately.
Saturday got up, cleaned up and headed back to The Dive for the ballgame. War Eagle! I forget what I said but Lucy hit me for it, then "Ouched" because she hit a rib, and I now have a gnome fist sized bruise on my back. We've had several words about that.
By halftime I was about gone again so we left to go to Dad's house. Nobody was home when we got there so we found a good music channel on TV and were tango-ing across the kitchen when the adults got home. Ooops. They laughed, we danced some more and proceeded to have a good time.
The Cackler fell asleep in the recliner. Bad, bad idea. I don't know what I said, but Dad suddenly appeared with a super soaker. Of course it would have been rude of me not to make use of it, so I did. The Cackler became The Sputterer pretty quickly. I got her a second time for good measure. I'm glad she has a sense of humor. She had to help Lucy get me in bed later. And she tucked me in. That was cool.
Dad cooked today so Grandson and family, us, and 1 of The Cackler's daughters and kids showed up. We had a good visit, good food. Cackler told everyone I shot her last night, I told them I had to hear about it first thing this morning because she was blaming me for her bad hair. I didn't even freak out about all the kids and noise so it was good.
Got back to town, dart shark beat up on me a few times, picked up pizza and brought the Jeep home, he was happy to see me. Now I need to put me in bed. It's looking to be a week.
Night kids.

BASLFHSLFJOUTNS

That's pretty much what Spawn says when he's frustrated, and I've adopted it. There is also finger pointing while spewing gibberish.
He giggles when I do it after him so all good.

Still shit to say, but I think I'm past the ability to say it. Lucidity has run, run for the hills. Lucy doesn't have enough sense to take the computer away from me. LOL.
Bed.

Since I'm getting Killed Anyway

I was going through my phone last night obviously and found pictures I'd forgotten about. A few weeks ago we were at Babysister's house and Spawn pulled out a Halloween costume to show me while Lucy was in the shower. My hangover and I fell out of the bed laughing.

He was a skeleton instead, and I told everyone it was because he was afraid of looking like Aunt Lucy and Ms. Sweet.

Totally Unrelated To Anything

This was Friday night, and obviously I remember little of it since I made a Friday afternoon of it. Good pic of me and Handsome.
I have a couple of other things from the weekend, but life got in the way and I forgot. I'll have to get back to ya, life again dammit.

Another Day...

Went to Babysister's house last night because yesterday was Mom's last treatment (We hope) and Mom asked me to come hang out with her today. She swears I was her good luck charm last time I did that because she didn't get sick. I don't know about all that, but it made her feel better, so there I was, and she had a good night and a pretty good day. She's swollen, but feeling ok so I'm all for whatever works. We had breakfast and I made her some potato soup again. I didn't think it was as good as last time but she said it was better so whatever.
I really wanted a nap and thought she would take one since she'd been up most of the night because of the steroids. Nope, she was chatty. Of course after I started the soup I had to go to Wal-Hell to get an onion because she thought she had one and no. I don't go to that place unless I have to, so there you go.
I'm beat. I need to check in with Lucy and probably Babysis and put my ass in bed.
Night kids.

So It's been a few days...

I worked Friday morning like a good girl, then went to The Dive to watch THE Football game. That's Alabama/Auburn to the one's who don't live around here. Yay, not Sabin's team btw. I don't care really, but I cheer for the other team because those fans are such assholes. Lucy showed up, as did Ms. Sweet. Gnomes kicked my ass at darts and that was pretty much that. I was stable enough to get Jeep home and Lucy and I slept for a few hours. I woke up around 3 and asked her if she wanted to go to Dad's, she did, so road tripping we went.
Dad and g/f are on a trip so it works.
We picked up breakfast on the way, got in, ate and went to bed. Had a fire and cooked last night, pretty much just hanging out, watching old movies, and working on the chore list Dad left. It was nice to just veg out for awhile. I'm back home now, watching "For The Boys" love that movie.
The Dive kinda got cleaned up after the debacle the other night, so that was good. Didn't go there today to see how things are, but hope it's ok.
Gonna smoke with the dog and check in with Lucy and put my ass in bed at a decent hour since I have to go back to the real world tomorrow. I'm supposed to go to Mom's tomorrow night for her last treatment. Trying to decide if I'm getting sick or not before making that decision final.
Need to go look at clothes to make sure I'll be presentable, and pack another bag.
Later kids.

So a woman walks into a bar...

It's been a day. Got up early since I really did go to bed early last night. Had coffee, started cleaning my room and doing laundry. Got stuff done. I now have room in my room, and need to iron. Maybe later. Hit the store so the dogs could eat tonight and headed over to Ms. Sweet's to work on computer. 4 hours later she had a printer and a freshly installed copy of Orifice 2010 (she told me she'd downloaded the file, she hadn't) so I left and had lunch while I was waiting for the download to finish. I love the woman to death, but The H channel and ancient aliens along with 3 hours of her running commentary almost did me in. Now the real fun starts.

I got done just in time for The Dive to open so off I go to have a couple of beers. I put my stuff on the bar and headed to the ladies room, only person there is the bartender, so I thought. I'm looking at the bag of crap in the hallway as I open the door, wondering what's up with that, look up and there's a ladder...with a person on it, and a can of paint headed for the floor. Target was hit. Thankfully I managed to get out of the way before it splashed. The floor is now going to be faux red brick. Ladies room too since the painter slipped and kicked the bucket on into the ladies after my participation was over.
She came out to take a break and kept apologizing to me because the paint can was hanging on the arm of the door and she didn't know the bar was open yet.
I sat around and listened to the guys talk football for a few and brought my ass on home. Finishing laundry, looking for something worth watching on tv, possibly ironing, and going to bed early again since I have to be at work in the morning.
Happy Thanksgiving kids.

Damn Pee Breaks

I got up at 4 a.m. (Notice the periods) to go to the restroom. Under duress. I think I tripped over a shoe and tangled up in last nights pants, but I'm not sure. I fell. At least I hit my back instead of my front this time. I'll spare you the picture.
There will be cleaning in the Wolf House tomorrow since the only semi-scheduled activity is working on Ms. Sweet's computer and she's home all day too.
I'm going to beat my way through the clutter to my bed and give up for the night. Night kids. And Happy Turkey Day.

Damned turkeys are overrated too.

What Is It With My Hair?

Today was a friend's birthday. I got to The Dive to see the Usual Suspects, I had a headache, everyone's kinda subdued, yay. 2 hours later it's all about rubbing on my head, and yes, there was a bit of pole dancing but that was even later.
I may have helped with a bit of it.
I'm home now, hope Birthday Girl's guy got her home ok.

Work was supposed to be quiet and let me take care of shit. It hasn't happened yet, we shall see how tomorrow goes.

I need to go cocoon so I can get to work early tomorrow. Night kids.

Catching up again

I told someone I was going on a 3 day binge when the computer system was pretty much finished. I started early since it broke Friday.
I got to Babysister's house yesterday pretty much trashed (Lucy was driving) and had to go see Mom since she was parading around hairless. Can't post a pic because she'll kill me, but trust me, she's kinda cute. She and Lucy made a chocolate pie last night and managed to leave out some ingredients, but it was still really good so I'm ok with that. At least Mom can blame Chemo Brain, Lucy has no excuse.
My hangover and I were pried out of bed way too early this morning because Babysis doesn't know how to make potato salad, Mom called me to come doctor the effort. It was ok. Shitloads of food and cleanup later pictures were taken and Mom made sure she got one with me without her wig on. She only put on hair for company apparently. I'm just glad she's having a sense of humor about it. Her (hopefully) last treatment is next week, she asked me to show up since she did really good last time I was there. I was expecting her to be barfing all over me, but she did really well, so now I'm her good luck charm. Whatever works.
I'm home, semi-sober and watching a movie while I decide if I want to do laundry or iron or neither. Big stuff going on here tonight let me tell ya.
Later kids.

Shit I Don't Post is Better than What I Do

This was last night's original post. I don't know what I was thinking, I like it better than what I put up later. Sometimes I should censor me and don't, other times I should just let go.
Today was awesome, Annie went to see a couple of people and she and J pretty much sold me out of bracelets, so yay.

Drunks are The Greatest People

Mom and Babysis entrusted me with 100 bracelets to sell for the child with leukemia.
Ok, I'm not good at sales, I have a vested interest in this since I know the child, and her mother, and her mother before her, but I'm not a salesman. Sales have obviously been slow.
Tonight, I got drunk, solicited the bar, and yeah. Most declined the bracelet and gave a donation. Even better. Many gave way more than the asking price for a bracelet.
Some of these people I know, talk to, spend time with. Lots, I just see around, we don't really talk. So it's really cool that they were all "Keep that, here's some money".

I Solicited Tonight

I went to The Dive after work DUH. I didn't even read, I sat with The Assholes and Mr. Cool and interacted. I know, Shock and something. This week is weird feeling, things are happening........twilight zone feeling happening.
Anyway, Darts were thrown, some more well than others. Mrs. Asshole and I kicked some ass sometimes, and others, we couldn't hit Brooklyn. After everyone left, and I had a hefty donation from my brother for The Child, I solicited the bar. I got lots of money without giving out bracelets. I'm good with that. Funny thing was both Assholes were wearing the one's I sold them last night. I guess they are friends.
People scare me, they're so damned unpredictable.

I'm just tired and bored with myself

Thanks Bruce.
I have Frankenhair. Mrs. Asshole and I will have words later. I wanted to get buzzed again, but getting cold, ok, just cut it. I'm not happy.
Funny, but not, I think everyone thinks Annie hit me since not a soul has asked about my eye. And I've seen quite a few people lately, of course it's work and The Dive where they all know me so. It's ruining a good story dammit.
Why do people mind their own business when it's the most inconvenient for me? Oh yeah, when I wanted them to, they didn't. I'm now labelled as a victim, and I'm anything but. It's crossed my mind to play that to my advantage, but that's evil me who needs to sleep. I'm trying to figure out why I give a shit so much. And I don't know, but I do. Taurus contrariness?

Yeah, it's like that

Work being a 4 letter word, it was a pain today. Someone asked me a question early and I'm like "Yeah, I'm the dumbass that hit myself in the face with a door and you're asking me?" I think that might make me a lesser dumbass.

I'm really tired of playing fireman everyday, it's not something I ever wanted to be. Anyway, going to bed early since I was up most of the night for one reason or another and I should probably get there before 7:30 tomorrow since that seems to be when the fires start. Later kids.

You'll never believe it

Mr. Shit woke me up at 5:30 to go out, even tho he has a doggie door. His Mother spoils him. I smoked, he didn't want to get his paws wet, back to bed I went. Rinse and repeat at 7:30 without the rain. At 10 I got up and packed up to come home. I dropped off stuff, went to work, shopped for work pants and drawers, met Babysis to get bracelets and boots, hit The Dive for some reading and came home where I made soup and cornbread. Annie was gonna make the soup, but I got tired of waiting on her.
Here's the part you won't believe. Wearing my new boots cuz they're cool, I went to shut the door to the junk room Annie had been cleaning out. Boot caught door as I was closing it, eyebrow hit door, blood was spilled, and I'm gonna have a lovely shiner. That old excuse about how you got a black eye? Totally possible.
Aside from that, I'm bored, tired and boring. Gonna put the shitload of soup I made into some bowls and put my ass in bed. Night kids.

I Forgot

I really did have something. I lost it between the last page and this.
I'm in the process of trying to alcohol poison myself to death. I don't see a successful end, but I'm making a mighty effort. Kinda, Sorta. Ok, I'm drinking less and less these days and it's sad that that kinda sucks. I'm sure I'll make up for it later.
I think I'll take Little Shit and head to bed now. Night.

Stuff

And more stuff, and stuff, and stuff and dammit.
Nothing major, just a funk, and I hate it.

No Dog Shit in the Dining Room

Ms. Sweet won't believe me, but there was not a mess waiting for me when I got here tonight. She left yesterday but my lame ass didn't want to drag work clothes and extra shoes over here to stay last night so I waited a day to show up for housesitting. Cutie and I are fine, he was happy to see me, we're watching tv while I do this and he chews on a treat. Sorry, have to stop for belly rubs occasionally.

I've had the headache from hell all week, pretty sure it's stress and exhaustion, even though I have been sleeping. I've been playing firefighter all week because it's always something.

Got a text from The Cackler this morning, Dad was having a cyst removed, then she sent me a pic of him in a hospital bed in one of those lovely gowns. Of course I facebooked it since he did that to me after my appendix, but it caused a small shitstorm. He didn't tell me, Step-nephew, or his wife that he was having anything done. I posted it, Step-nephew's wife replied to it freaking out.......so Dad is in trouble. Good.

Calling Mom to check in, going to smoke with Little Shit and that'll probably be about it. May be back later.

Our Boys

That's a term Annie and I use for our bartenders, past and present who we've always been friends with. Even if it's been months, we see each other, there's a hug and a catching up along with a "I'll try to see you soon."
There was a robbery at a bar the other night, Annie came to my office to ask if any of "Our Boys" were still working there, most had been there but left. Bartenders tend to migrate, especially the good ones.
I gave her a name I wasn't sure about, The Princess said no, he'd left there. As more details became available it was ok. Our boy wasn't a victim. Turns out he was the robber. He's also dead.
That's fucked up. I don't know how he got where he was, he had friends if he needed help. I'm going to sleep now. That just depressed the hell outta me. Night kids.

Mom Update 2033

Mom is doing well so far. That's good. Trying to multitask at the moment and doing it badly. Must sleep, later kids.

Return of The Mummy

Or something like that anyway. I worked a while yesterday, Lucy came by to help me, but thankfully it didn't take as long as I thought so I got out and went to The Dive for some free food and not so free beer. Lucy and I got a motel room last night and I lost a ring somewhere. Yes, I went back and searched the room again to no avail. I hate losing shit. Got a note in there in case it turns up and need to see yesterday's bartender to see if it was found at The Dive, but it most likely wound up in the trash because they're all too big but I wear them anyway dammit. Or did. I think I'll drop them for awhile.
Got excited about Big K's sale today only to not want to shop. I did pick up a couple of belts while I was killing time because the time change has fucked me up on top of everything else.
Hit The Dive again this afternoon for some reading, came home and watched The Philadelphia Story while ironing, so everything I own is ironed now. I need to sleep, I'm still exhausted. I'm too old for this shit.
Dad was having a birthday party for Grandson and his wife this afternoon, I opted out because it was too far away. Mom is having a treatment tomorrow so I need to call. Just gonna go to bed I think. I'll deal with the real world tomorrow.

Really?

I'm braindead. Found out today I still have things to do, I was hoping for a work free weekend. Bastids. Think I'll put me in bed.

Sometimes, people amaze me

Yesterday was a clusterfuck of a clusterfuck. Long story short, I could stay at work half the night or go get some food and sleep and go in early today. I chose the latter. I think the cook at The Dive has a thing for me, I know it's a jumbo hotdog but DAYUM, and I got about 4 orders of fries. Anyway I was in bed by 9:15 and at work at 4:30 this morning. Now you know what the whole plant knows. People I don't even say hello to knew what time I came in because I told one person after the 5th "Did you spend the night?" comment.
Crazy. I'm probably doing the same thing tonight without the early, early morning tomorrow. I'm already into overtime for the week so I'd really like to scale back just a bit. I remember why I quit working shitloads of overtime now, I'm old and it hurts.
There are stories if I can remember them later, but for now, just be proud, I haven't killed anyone or called them really bad names. I did clean out my work closet this morning, except for the dead mouse in the corner, I didn't have any breakfast to lose. Night kids.

Checks

On time? Yes. Grouchy? Not so much till later, I'll work on that for tomorrow.
Running on Coffee and cigarettes? Hell yeah. I'm an entire episode of Mad Men right now.
Putting my tired ass in bed so I can start over again. I have to keep reminding me it's not Wednesday.

Internet Broken?

I hit publish on that last one last night, I promise.

Got to work early and Boss was already there, worked all day, lost connection to server and said nope. Leaving. Tomorrow will be ugly.

Putting ass in bed so I can at least be there and grouchy on time. Night kids.

Now I'm Psychic

I have no fucking idea what I was talking about last night. Apparently I was stupid or something. I worked all day, gotta put my ass in bed so I can start all over tomorrow. And apparently I've been dreaming way too much since I've typed this before. Dammit.

I Have Issues

Lots of them. Right now they don't matter. Right now I'm ok with that. Sorta. Kinda. Right now, it's work which is way different than the rest of me. Work IS. Sometimes that's bad, but it's still an IS.
I'm working on categorizing my IS along with my MAY, and my HAS BEEN, FEELING OF THE MOMENT and OMG THIS IS RIGHT NOW.
At the Moment, I'm drunk. I didn't mean to be, but here I is. I have to be at work, alert by 7:30 am. I'll do it, not like it, but I will. I'll probably be there at 5 making coffee just because I can, but that's different.

I just let The Handsome Devil in the house because he was sitting on the deck barking. Like it would make a difference if he was in or out. He came in expecting one thing and........yeah. It's all kinda like that.

I don't know where I picked up the Zen, but it IS.

I'm probably gonna explode all over everything before it's over. Right now I'm very calm and collected and being nice. I'm scaring me.
I'm stressed, and trying to play nice, but dammit. I'm gonna break.

I think I'll just shut up, do this, and wonder what the hell I was talking about later.
.

Nothing to say

Shit and shit, and more shit, and SHIT just for good measure.

I have become seriously uninteresting, hell, I'm not even interested in me at the moment and I can usually get a little sumpin sumpin going on.

There may be stuff later, but tonight, not so much and it annoys me. I've got a whole bowl full of shit I could spread around, but it's not doing anything for me.

I think I need to investigate a hotel with padded rooms for awhile. It's not often my giveashit gets broken. Maybe it's a design flaw, or maybe I've been in too many fucking meetings lately. I keep turning in my keys, and keep working. Maybe I should pick better people to give up on.

Name Calling

I've been called a lot of things. Especially while throwing darts. Tonight it was mostly Bitch and Whore. The one time the C word got thrown around, I stopped that. Mr. Cool said something after the other guys left tonight and I told him I'd been called a lot of shit. So he made up Skanktigger. It made me laugh so ok.
Mom was apparently enjoying her day too much. Lucy sent me a text that mom was casket shopping, then Mom told me she was in trouble because Babysis had sent a neighbor to look for her since she was supposed to be home. Text from Mom about being in trouble said "this 2nd childhood might be fun." Go Mom.
I've got too much shit in my head. It's my normal state I know, but damn.
Annie was texting and calling when I wasn't home by 9 and we have pretty much established that we hate each other so it must have been to make sure I was available for work. I dunno. She's nice when she doesn't have to be. I'm not so nice all the time. Maybe it's just me.
I'm so fucking confused.
Lucy is threatening to divorce me since sleeping with me is now like sleeping with a stranger and I've gotta buy new pants, and shirts, and bras and drawers. Damn, I'm expensive.
Ms. Sweet informed me my StepDog pooped in her diningroom since he didn't want to go out in the rain. I told her he didn't do that to me so she's on her own. StepDog indeed.
Obviously I needed a braindump and this is it.
I'm so screwed in so many ways, I just need to go to sleep I think.
I'll be at work nonstop starting tomorrow as far as I know. Shit is supposed to happen Monday, and nobody is ready for that. This should be fun. I need to see what I could do with a brain if I had one.
Going to call Lucy and go to bed. Night kids.

New Glasses

It's sad that I got excited at the Dollar Tree today about new glasses. I bought $8 of happy. I have reading glasses to match anything I want to wear. Lucy found that amusing.
She and I ended up at The Asshole's house last night for a football party neither of us wanted to go to, but it worked out well. I hurt my knee playing with the dog but we had decent shrimp boil and took off to hang out together for a change. It was a pretty decent weekend.
I came home with my new glasses, went back out to work for a bit and hit The Dive for some reading, finishing laundry and about to put my tired ass in bed.
New Computer System is supposed to go live Monday. I'm not seeing it, but if they want to go, I'll probably be stuck at work for the next week.
Mom is doing ok, not sick, but losing hair and brain cells right now, she'll be different tomorrow I'm sure. At least she still loves me right now so that's good.
Ok, that bed thing is looking better and better, night kids.

Good Hair Day

I was having one Tuesday. That's all cool, but I took Mom to the Cancer place for her booster shot after her treatment on Monday. All those bald people were looking at me funny, especially when "Play That Funky Music" started blaring from my phone at 8:15 because work needed me. It was my finest 2 seconds, I tell ya.
I got to Mom's Monday night a little later than scheduled, but she was feeling well. I spent the night with Babysis and didn't sleep while I got ready to deal with sick Mom all day Tuesday. We did ok. She ate more than I did at breakfast, I made a pot of potato soup for her, apparently I made up for being the child from hell. Who knew potato soup could cure everything?
I came home Tuesday night and slept a lot, and caught up some more last night so I'm pretty good now.
Mom did wear a ballcap over her wig thingy Tuesday. It was Spawn's. I didn't see her head until Tuesday evening after Babysis got home. I expected her to be pretty much bald. Nope, she has a pretty impressive mohawk going on. My hair is thick, hers is at least twice as thick as mine is the only reason I can think of that it isn't gone yet. I'm just glad she's doing well this time. I was scared after she got so sick after the first treatment, but they kinda knew what to expect this time. Halfway through, hope the last 2 go as well. And yes, the spots have shrunk a lot. Maybe this will kill it off, I hope, hope, hope.
She gave me a great picture of Other Mom who lost her battle about the time my Mom found out. Other Mom's granddaughter is having treatment for leukemia right now. She's 5. Dammit. Now I've made me cry, I should sleep some more.
Later kids, and thanks.

Mom Update # 10023

Mom is doing well. I came home Tuesday night since she was feeling ok and got an update early this morning that she's still feeling ok so all good so far. I'll try for a more coherent posting about our time together later.

Trifecta

June Cleaver, Howard Cunningham and Boy are all dead.
I promise I had nothing to do with it.

Misunderstanding and Missing

Lucy assured me I was probably just over-sensitive yesterday so I took Dad's comments wrong. She was correct. I was a basket case. Still am, but at the moment I'm relatively calm. I picked her up and we hit The Dive while I decided whether to go to Dad's or get a room and she talked to The Cackler and cleared up my mess for me. We went to Dad's. The Cackler was going to watch her grandson play football so Lucy went with her and Dad and I had a couple of hours of catching up on everything where we actually talked about feelings and stuff and it was good. We haven't had much just us time lately, and haven't really talked like that in ever. We hung around today and went to another small town to visit the gourd festival since he's all artsy crafty and stuff and looked down when I said I needed to get home today. I'm glad I gave in and told him we'd go, it was a great time. I played SlugBug on Lucy all the way there and kept the adults entertained.
I came back and helped Ms. Sweet set up her new computer, brought her old one home to try to revive it so I can get her stuff off and have been doing laundry and reading.
Tomorrow. Mom has her next treatment tomorrow. Babysis is taking her since she's off but I'm going down after work to stay with her and don't know when I'll be back. Even with all the hurt and upset from last week with her, I can't abandon her so I'll be a good kid and do what I said I would. I don't have internet access down there and depending on how sick she gets after, we may be at the hospital for a few days. I really hope not for her sake, but I'll be AWOL for at least a couple of days.
I'm trying to catch up everything tonight and tomorrow before I disappear and possibly end up in a psych ward. Y'all take care and play nice while I'm gone.

Waiting for The Bars to open

I'm at work because home isn't pleasant. Annie can't quietly hate, she has to hunt me down and rant or send me nasty texts so I'm better off somewhere else.
I was going to Dad's tonight but along with the "Come on down" I got a "bring my pictures and door key with you." WTF? I don't have either, but apparently he thinks I took those things last week. That pretty much blows my last safe haven completely out of the water. I give up.

My Keyring is a lot Lighter

I quit my job today and gave Annie all my keys. It didn't stick, I'll be back there tomorrow, but I can't deal right now.
After Mom ripped me a new one Sunday, Babysis got me in text messages last night after the day from hell. I came home and took it out on Annie and things went from bad to worse.
She's staying somewhere else tonight because she apparently got the clue that we're not friends anymore. I haven't felt like we were for months, but she's stupid sometimes.
I'm going to put my ass in bed since everyone hates me right now, sleep seems like the best option I have.

Can't Win for Losing

I waited a couple of days. Finally talked to Babysis about the mess with Mom the other day. It didn't go well. I'm still hurt and mad and apparently everyone else is now too, so yay me. I'd like to watch The Good Wife and give a shit, but there's a thunderstorm and cold front coming, nevermind, it's here so I guess I'll grab a cigar and go outside.
Later kids.

The Cackler and The Downer

I've been looking for a name for the new g/f, Dad's not mine. Even tho she and Lucy will be the same age tomorrow. Hi Lucy!
Dad was around but not too much yesterday afternoon, Lucy and I hung out with The Cackler and talked, they talked, I threw in a something occasionally. We had a great time. She's pretty awesome, I like her a lot. Her kids told her what I told Dad. If they fuck this up, someone is getting their ass kicked.
I may be delivering said ass-kicking. I hope not.
We have tape of some of the conversation thanks to Dad. He gave me his mini recorder so he could hear us later, it was good. There was a lot of laughter. I haven't laughed much lately, but I did yesterday and last night.
We got to Mom's house today and she killed all of it. Lucy may kill her before I do for that one. I'm still upset and need to process, but I told Annie about it earlier and best we can figure is she was jealous about me being at Dad's. Even though I had permission to go there, and hang out, she waited till Lucy was in the house to rip me. I almost walked out the door and came home right then. Lucy told me on the way home she expected me to leave right that moment also. I stayed because it would have been worse if I'd let her win. If the cancer doesn't kill her, I probably will. I've been on an emotional rollercoaster for months anyway, she took center stage one she got sick again but now she's using it against me if I have something else going on that isn't her. I should go to sleep. Night kids.

My Exciting Life

Annie came home way late tonight, noticed the squirrel hanging around that I saw earlier. I was out back, talking to Lucy when she got home, didn't pay too much attention, heard her in and out of the Utility Room, finished call, came in house, and she has a gun. Ok, a pellet pistol, but still, that's scary if you know Annie (hint:Annie Oakley is a joke). She saw squirrel on the side of the house (and didn't even think to look for Moose) so she got the pellet pistol and missed of course.
Apparently Squirrel is looking for a nesting place with a view of the driveway, preferably with wi-fi.
I went out and hosed his ass into the neighbor's yard. About to go smoke again and check to see if he's back, then put my ass in bed. I'm eating and sleeping a whole lot lately. Night kids.

I feel like a Pushup, I mean Pinup

I wore a sweater today.


Besides the fact that it's 500 yrs old, it got great reviews.
Sorry for the bathroom pic, but I had to send it to Lucy after Perv Boss told me I "looked great." I got a "cute" from her, doesn't quite measure up ya know.
I proceeded to be complimented on the sweater multiple times. I guess I should drag out some more of that shit I was gonna give to Goodwill and wear it. I also got a "pretty", told her I was working on getting a raise lol.

Bowling and Beef Stew

I stayed up way past my bedtime last night and Wii bowled with Annie. I know, apparently she got ahold of some strange kool-aid while I was gone, she's actually been nice and shit. Still not sure what to make of that, but anyway. After getting into bed around 1, I got up and went to work where it was a chore to walk around because between my left hip and my right thigh, I hurt like hell. Obviously I haven't done much since I got laid up. I'll have to fix that. Most of the day was spent in front of the computer doing bullshit so my shoulders and back are now killing me, ice is my friend.
I left work thinking about beef stew since the weather has turned cool (and I'm freezing my non-existent ass off) so I went to the store and after a bit of reading at The Dive, came home and made some pretty awesome stew. Maybe Annie will leave enough for lunch tomorrow.
Now I'm putting my ass in bed because if this isn't the most boring post in the history of the world I don't know what is.

Footnote: Mom isn't feeling well so I'm worried and rambling. And I finally started what will be my first of I'm not sure how many periods this month. Yay getting older. Night kids.

Lucy's Latest

Lucy has been having trouble with her van. Gauges have been iffy if at all, so she hasn't driven it in awhile. Long story short, she was driving it to Mom's Thursday and called me, stuck on the side of the road, looking for an idea of where she might be so she could call the wrecker. I helped her with that, thinking, I should go out there, but I didn't because work was stupid. It worked out, she got towed, Babysis was in town and could pick her up, so she got where she was going. Guys who got her van thought she blew the engine. They called the next day with good news. She was just out of gas.
She told my family. Of course she hasn't heard the end of it yet. First thing yesterday, I heard something about it from someone else, then someone else, then Babysis, then Mom. She'll never live it down.
Poor Lucy :)

Little Shit 2 and Lucy

I'm house sitting again. Mr. Shit has been groomed since the last time I was here so he's a tad less furry, but just as much fun and snuggly. He's still pretty cool.
Damn old women and hot flashes, it's getting cool out, Ms. Sweet's thermostat is trying to kill me. I should make sure I re-adjust before I leave tomorrow.
Lucy has been hanging with my family. There is a giant yard sale going on this weekend and she took some stuff down where she was set up with the Step Nephew since the spot is courtesy of Dad's new G/F who I need to give a name to. Step Nephew and I both really like her so hopefully she's a keeper.
Lucy is staying with Babysis while she does this so she's getting a dose of everyone. She's re-thinking that marriage thing she was so set on. Heh. I told her.
Mom is feeling better, I think I forgot to tell you she spent 2 nights in the hospital since she was dehydrated. Hopefully she'll be ok now and we'll know what to expect for the next round of treatment. I'm off to smoke with Mr. Shit and put my ass in Ms. Sweet's bed because it's been Monday all damn week. Night kids.