That Day

I've been trying to do something for hours, and it wouldn't work. Then I saw my last post. Scary I was that coherent when I have no memory of it whatsoever.
I've been wanting to bitch and whine, and I guess I got over it a bit. Not completely, but mostly.
I hate the people I hang out with right now. I need to quit hanging out with them, because I had a choice today and apparently I made the wrong one. I'll be over that tomorrow, but yeah, some days I don't want to deal with all their drama and stupidity.

I had my review at work (even tho it's not due for a bit, it's done) A month or so from now I'll get a pay raise. I'm middle of the road performance-wise too, just so you know. I don't feel so bad about not giving a shit anymore, wish I'd done it before I killed myself.

I can't apply for the other job because I flunked the management test and can't re-take it for 6 months to a year. I answered as me instead of the Devil, wasn't thinking.

I need to go see Dad, it's been way too long since I was pampered.

That's another thing, I pushed Lucy away to the point where I can't even call her to bitch. She was a good sounding board. Oh well. Live and learn.

Been That Week

I've been muttering to myself every morning, just one more day.... I finally got there. Squeaky Wheel is up to something. She had stuff pulled up on the computer about bereavement leave, I pointed out her husband's aunt wasn't included, she insisted it was, and she's not working so ok.
If she thinks she's getting paid and not, not my problem. New kid and I are doing ok. New kid scares me a bit, she's so insecure,  but she's ok. She's got the job down, and I mess with her, but she's ok. Obviously I like her. I'm not so sure about the other one anymore. I'm still looking for an out. I have the whole weekend to do that WHEEEEEEEEEE!

Someone else is moving and her job is coming open. I'm going to ask her Monday to recommend me for it because really? 2 pay grades above what I'm making with less bullshit. I want. I already know how to do it, I help there when I'm not busy. Doesn't happen much, but it has happened.

I don't get that either. I have keys, have to unload trucks, meet vendors, truckers, deal with people in general. She just rides herd on the employees so they get their shit out of the back room and puts up what has to stay in the back room. And makes much more bucks. I would have to give up my Weekend off though. I think I could deal with it.

Different

I talked to my Mom for awhile tonight. I haven't done that in too long. We caught up, and then talked about a lot of other shit, and family that she and I don't really know anymore.
We both miss my Paternal grandma, and my Aunt. Babysis has a different set of relatives, but I'm related to them too, so it was an evening.
I've been thinking about some of the same people we were talking about, so it was good to catch up.
I miss both my grandmother's, I knew one when I was really young, but remember her well. I spent summers, and winters with the other and miss her too. They each had their place in my my heart when I was young,  and one stuck around long enough to see me as a young woman. I wasn't yet an adult, I'm probably still not, but I enjoyed hanging out with her after I was able to drive, and converse in real language.
 I probably ate pig knuckles that day she insisted on cooking lunch for me, but damn they were good. I visited her a few times, besides the lunch, I took her a plant, she replied with a throw she had crocheted. And stories, and smiles.
I wish I had reminded her of the summers, and the winters, and how much they meant to me. Summer was creeks, and grapes, and wide open windows at night.
Winters were fudge by the fireplace, peanut brittle, and piling quilts onto the feather bed where I made my nest in the middle.
I wish kids today could know that.

I'm Too Old to Be Doing This Shit

So I was stuck in the middle of the shitstorm between the new employee and the other one. Apparently my esteemed co-worker took it upon herself to be a total ass to the new girl while I wasn't around, and a little bit while I WAS around, and then went to a manager saying a bunch of shit about her not being able to do the job. I heard most of this from the new chick because co-worker didn't say too much to me after I told her I thought the girl was doing ok.

So, they were both off Wednesday, I told new girl to enjoy her day off and breathe and we'd deal with things Thursday. I hung out with her, watched her do the job, she ignored the troublemaker, and I didn't have too much to say to her, but wasn't ugly about anything. I really don't want to get in a confrontation if I don't have to because it'll be not pleasant for anyone.
Apparently squeaky wheel got the message, I got there today and she had apologized to new girl for being an ass, and things were much more pleasant.

I'm off this weekend and squeaky wheel managed to do the same. We'll see what happens next week. Management was ready to jump into the fray after ass said something to them, but hopefully that has been put off for now anyway because even if I didn't like new chick? I still like having another body around so I don't have to do everything because squeaky wheel is a pain in my ass.
And yeah, I think squeaky wheel will be her permanent name because she is, all the time, if it's not one thing it's another, and you know what they say about squeaky wheels and grease. I'm just trying to hang on until end of September when I'll have some time I can take so if I get an interview or something, it won't kill me. It was fun for awhile, but it's no longer amusing and I hope it's just a rest stop on my highway to somewhere better. I got out of my old rut and learned a lot of new shit that will hopefully serve me well down the road.

Now the other shit that has me so mad I can't stand anyone. Speeding tickets. She missed the court date on the first one after she didn't pay it. Suspended license, new court date, paid money to make the warrant go away, I just told her to make sure she pays the second one before it comes up because I can't bail her out or make the house payment if she goes to jail and/or loses her job. I also don't want to cart her ass around while she has no license because she was stupid twice. I could understand if she did this shit drunk, because I've done a whole lot of stupid shit under the influence, but no. 6 am on the tickets, and just plain lackadaisy bullshit on missing the date and shit. Like the tires, she would have ranted at me 6 ways to Sunday if I had been the one to do that. Think it's time for me to go do something else for awhile and get some sleep. At least ticket whore is staying somewhere else tonight.

Here We Go Again

Yep, there was much whining, since I was only there for it Tuesday I told her to zip it. She had a day, I had 2 weeks. Everyone else told me how ugly it was Monday, and I said Oh Well. She was off  yesterday and today was a whole different level of it. She got help from somewhere else because mgmt was upset. Really?
I'm looking hard for something else because my idea of being in the background, not having to deal with people, something I could deal with, isn't gonna last. I refuse to be that whiny ass to get some help and I'll probably end up in trouble for it in the end. THEIR LOSS.
I do my job, her job, and someone else's job most of the time. I didn't have time for all that today because MY job got slammed. I still got to do someone else's because they never showed up after they were called. When I get in trouble, I'll be sure to tell them that along with the Fuck You I'm sitting on.
I think there may be a "Rain quit" party tomorrow unless there's some serious ass kissing to me going on. I know I need a job, but this one has pushed me to limits it took the other one over a decade to get me to. I don't have that much patience anymore.

BWAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAA

Cough, cough. So I got my 2 days off, schedule all fixed so I won't be an exception, even though I AM exceptional. Got texts from that co-worker this afternoon asking about things, never told her I'm off Monday because I'm actually afraid she'll call in if she knows it. Spiteful? Yes I am a bit. I've been beat to hell worse than usual lately and I'm really not happy about it, and I know all I'm gonna hear from her is whining when she gets back, and I'll probably nip that in the bud pretty quickly too because I really don't care, and I don't like her all that much anyway.
Anyway, I know my stuff won't get done Monday, partly because she won't have time for all of it, but mostly spite on her part, and I don't give a damn. I'll catch it up Tuesday which means "Darn, I won't have time to help her any." Yep, I've pretty much declared war. She's talking about transferring (when it suits her to talk about it), and I hate to tell her, she's expendable. So am I for that matter, but my replacement won't do half the shit I do so there.
Yes, I'm looking. Will do a lot more of it while I'm off, sitting in front of the computer in my boxers with pussy in my lap too. Now I'm off to play for a bit and put my tired ass in the bed, where I can stay until whenever tomorrow :) Night.

And Yet Again

One more day of going in way early. I can do this. Schedule is screwed to hell and I'll probably end up in trouble before it's all over since I can't get anyone to change anything, all I have is 1 e-mail and a verbal about my hours for the next few days. Also don't give a damn. I'm being used and abused because I'm awesome, and it would probably be a favor to me if they let me go over something stupid. It's not like I'm stealing or anything, I'm disgustingly honest. Anyway, at least I've made a few possible connections I need to be looking into, but most of those involve me being up early and pleasant every day, to some unpleasant people from what I hear. Seems everyone likes seeing me because even on a bad day, I'm not a total bitch. I'm slacking.
Anyways, playing a bit longer and putting ass in bed so I can get through tomorrow. Then at least 1 day off, I'm gonna try for 2 so that bitch that went on vacay can have a day by herself and see how she likes it.
Later.

A Day Off

Had to cover for that bitch yesterday so I went to work at 5 a...m... I wasn't happy about it at all, but I did, got shit done, got out and looked forward to a day off. I didn't manage to stay up late enough to watch one of my favorite movies, but I've seen it a dozen times so still all good. Slept in, chilled around the house, finally got dressed and went to float in my boat at The Asshole's house. Sat around, smoked a cigarette, went inside to change into swimming togs and came back out to a thunderhead looming.
I never did get wet. Finally gave up, changed back into me clothes and came home because I'd had a couple of shots and a couple of beers, and pretty much done after that.
Cooked some taters since I needed carbs because all I ate there was a couple of fried pickles and french fries. Dinner wasn't happening for a long time, and I can't hang like that anymore.
I'm fighting sleep now because I want to sleep all night. I haven't done that in several nights and it sucks. I only have to do my duty for 2 days, and another day off! Then everything is stupid all over again, but whatever. I think I'll smoke and play for another minute and go to bed anyway. I'm still tired, and my work neice may be getting fired since she called in yesterday, dammit. That hurts me too, she's a good kid, but anyways. Later.

Can't Bitch on Facehell

I can, but I friended a manager from work because she was leaving, and she's apparently not so much now, and I don't like to unfriend people who actually laugh at my insanity.
Most things i can't put there anyway because Annie reads it, and everyone else so. Back to the point, if I ever had one.
Work. That co-worker went on vacation. I'm mad at her for taking it, mad at management for letting her, and mad for the person who was sent to cover for her because she and I are both going above and beyond here. The cover did this for a few days a couple of months ago, she's lost. I ran from 7 to 12 today because I had to. I only stopped then because we both took lunch because she was past due and I said fuck it. I ran again from 1 to 4 because she left at 2 and there was still lots of shit to be done.
I only did some of that shit because I'm nice and didn't want the cover to walk into all that mess at 5 tomorrow.
I've got to get out of here, they'll let me run the whole fucking store while they sit on their asses, because I can.
I spent too many years in the same place. I talk to women my age and older, and they all bitch about the younguns, they don't come to work, or don't do anything when they do show up, Not true on all fronts, but yeah, there's a whole lot of it. I know which younguns I want on my Zombie Apocalypse team, and which ones will be feed. I'm tired, my old ass can't keep doing this. I'm exhausted and not sleeping well, and yeah, beer should help me sleep well, but it isn't working lately.
One of my kids ( I have a Neice and Nephew at work, they call me Auntie) mentioned leaving yesterday and I teared up. I don't do that shit. But I've been doing a lot of it today too, and I'm  pretty sure it's just because I'm tired. Gonna go shower because it's hotter than Hades around here and I sweat and get dusty, nasty at work and hope I will sleep until the alarm goes off. Later.

Another Day.........Another Dumbass

I had a headache all day, my stomach wasn't happy, and I was pissed at my whiney ass co-worker so it wasn't fun. It got even better :) Annie and I threw some darts and her dumb ass hit a curb on the way home and punctured 2 perfectly good tires because she can't keep her foot out of the engine these days. At least she was close to home and didn't kill anyone in the process, but really?
She's already got 2 speeding tickets that I don't ask about, but I know we're broke so I'm just trying to conserve my money because I can't do much else.
Headache is back and tomorrow is probably not going to be pretty either. Already told her she's on her own with ride arrangements because I have to work no matter what. I'm pissed, but......can't do anything about it. Thing is, if it was the other way around she would be all over me right now, bitching me out. Yeah, I need to do something else, far away from here all the way around.

WOOHOO

I had a line of people waiting for me this morning because I had to cover for someone else. Busted my ass to do my job and made damn sure it was done.
I was scheduled to work tomorrow, for no apparent reason. Yes, double time, but it wouldn't be worth it to me. I asked, and I received. I'm now the proud owner of a day off. Annie is trying her best to ruin it for me, but dammit I will persevere. I will chill on the couch with Cat all day if that's what I want. I may go to the Asshole's to swim, but it's doubtful, and I might cook a hotdog on the grill at home to commemorate the occasion, but mostly I'll just not have to deal with anyone I don't want to. I think that will be the best  thing for everyone.
Yay, utility company is here to take care of that pesky limb so maybe Annie will quit freaking out and leave me alone now.
I feel another WOOHOO coming on.

Now I'm Rude

I probably was. Dinner wasn't gonna happen till about now, I wasn't hungry anyway and my hostess was inebriated already. I winked at Annie and came home because work had already kicked my ass, I wasn't the least bit hungry, and the shot of tequila didn't do my any favors so I wanted to get home before there was risk of bodily injury to anyone on the road.
I got texts from the hostess and her husband, which I replied to and apologized . Then I get some from Annie, so I had to call her and get a whole bunch of shit.
I'm sorry, she asks me if I'm looking for another job, after she didn't want me to take one a few weeks ago. So I told her it's none of her fucking business as long as I'm paying my way.
I really just don't care, I will apologize in a phone call tomorrow to my hostess since she's the one really upset, and you know what? Fuck the rest. I'm going to bed.

Could be a Felon

I broke and entered accidentally today. Ok, I entered, I didn't break. I was invited to swim, she didn't answer phone, I showed up. Her car there, door unlocked, I always just walk in. Today I was doing that with sunglasses on and shit in my hands when I hear a beep-beep-beep and go "OH SHIT." Alarm code is in my wallet somewhere, aforementioned sunglasses still in place and I can't see without reading glasses so WHEEEE.
I managed, and had a few minutes of bliss before everyone else showed up. It was nice to just float for a bit. I may try it again soon while they're gone.

I'm A Wuss.

Who knew? I"m being abused , and I'm letting them, and I shouldn't be. Hmmm, maybe because I was raised to work for a living. I should talk more with the people around me who are calling out because they got an ouchie, or work interfered with their going out. Or OMG, they had to work and they're tired. I can barely move these days, and I'm still going, and it's stupid. I shouldn't have to do this. I need to take a new inventory because I shouldn't be this.

Yep, just meZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
I'm not sure where all those z's came from, but they can stay  because that's where I'm headed.
I'm in a whole lot of hell right now. Job hates me, Annie is telling me old job went belly up, which I want to  celebrate, but not. I need to get out of the new one because it's killing me, but dammit it's a job. I need a day or two to hang out with Dad, I haven't had that in while.

Going to bed/

It's Me Again

I need to find a new job, but I'm too tired. I had a meltdown last night, and almost walked out today, and the meltdown happens occasionally the walking out thing? Not so much.
Annie wants me to help her paint a house, but I hurt, and I'm tired, and it's all because I'm too fucking old for the job I'm doing. Or as other people tell me, I'm doing too much at the job I'm doing and I shouldn't be doing it. I guess I need to tell them to kiss my ass because I don't have to do it, but I'm not sure how, other than walking out or using those words. I'm going to bed  because tomorrow is going to suck again, and maybe report that head injury I suffered today as a reason for my sudden onset of Tourette's that I'm sure I'll begin suffering from.

Saturday, All Alone

Other than an early morning text that pertained to Annie more than me, I was having a decent day. Watched The Color Purple for the 100th time, love that movie. Hung around unshowered and braless until...........
I went out back to smoke because there was a birthday party going on across the street so I decided not to smoke on the stoop and scare the kids.
I found a dead rat last night when I went out to water the garden, today I found a small mocking bird and a kitten. I don't know if the kitten killed the others, but I know the dogs killed the kitten and it just ruined my fucking day. I don't have a problem throwing a rat and a bird in the trash, but I had to bury the kitten, which pretty much finished off my shoulder as far as I'm sore as shit, and it hurt my heart. It was probably a distant cousin of Cat which makes it even worse. Back to that PMS I have that isn't going anywhere because it's been about a year since the M part was here.

Rambling again, kitten bothered me. Told it I was sorry, but dogs are dogs and it was in their yard. What really pisses me off is it happened while I was home today, no barking, no nothing. I don't like them much anyway so they're lucky I only hit them with a glove because I really wanted to use the shovel.
Anyway, off to bed with some ice soon because I hurt all over again and need to buck up since I have to work 6 days this week in addition to helping Annie do some painting at the Gnome's. My body is never gonna be the same.

Had a Bad Day

Insert music here. I'm too tired to find it and I'm pretty sure you don't want a song clip anyway, so there we go.
Spilled soda in my lap on my way to work because I haven't been to the store lately. I was having a go cup instead of a trusty can because I'm cheap, and there's nothing wrong with that until you arrive at work in  brown pants with a wet crotch.
I promptly got pissed off once I walked in because yet again, things not done. I dropped a pallet on my foot, and thankfully it wasn't a wooden one, or I would have been here way earlier with a cast on said foot.
Pretty much like that all day. I keep telling myself I have a job. Some days I love it, but days like this, not so much.
I knew better than to go to The Asshole's house, but did anyway since I was invited and most of the time I'm not rude. Hung out for a bit and came home before dinner was done because they were bickering, Annie is useless and I wasn't hungry.
Annie came in the door telling me "even I could do her job" so maybe I should polish up the reume' and look for something else since I'm so beat up these days. Apparently I was dinner conversation.
I"m whining again, I know. I've thought about it. I'd rather be beaten up right now than go back to a high stress job. Mom gave me shit about my profile pic on facehell, but the funny thing is I do look younger now than I did 3 years ago. I took that at the old job when I was stressed out all the time. Even a bad day here is better than what I was back then, so I'm good with that for now.
I don't plan to make this my life, but I do have more good days than bad. So far. Hopefully this week is an abberation and it won't continue. I'm still babystepping back into the real world,  I'm also apparently hormonal because I've cried about something off and on all day and that just pisses me off too, so there we go.
I need to shower and put my ass in bed. I stink because yep, I sweat, and it's hot as hell where I am, and I haven't looked at my foot yet to see if it's "kiss it and make it better" worthy or not. I know it's not broken, but it's sore.
I think I've rambled enough, I'm gonna take that shower and put my ass in the bed.

I'm Really That Old?

Yep, I circled the sun another time today. Wasn't a big deal. I'm still here, so that's a good thing.
I don't visit this place very often anymore, mainly because I'm tired all the time, and quite possibly because I don't drink so much anymore because I'm tired all the time. I seem to have sense enough to shut up and go to bed most nights these days. I guess that's some of the wisdom that comes with age? HA. Something like that anyway.
I seem to be a new person these days too, it's scary. I'm quite popular at the job, someone told me a couple of weeks ago she was concerned about me, I didn't seem as upbeat as usual......I was having a bad beat to hell day so I told her I'd just been tired, but thanks for the concern. I make sure I smile at her every time I see her now.
I did take yesterday off because last week beat me up and the trip to KY was a whirlwind of drive up, party, come home, so I called in exhausted. Felt much better today thanks to that. I'm still too old to be slinging boxes around, but hell, it's a paycheck, and most days I like it, so I'm good.
I got shitloads of Happy Birthdays today, which made me feel good, some I actually cared about (Jackiesue) some I know were just because Facehell told them to. For the most part, they were from people I actually care about whether I've met them or not, so YAY.
I ended up at friends tonight instead of where I intended to go, and she cooked oysters (which I hate), chicken, was good, canned asparagus (not a fave), stovetop stuffing, again, and strawberry stuff in pastry with fresh whipped cream. I would have preferred apple, but it was good.
The fact that she cooked for me made it special, and I love her and the big ape she's married to so it was good.
Looks like time to go play a game for a minute and put my ass in bed. Night kids.

It Was a Day, in a Week of Days

Let's see, Fedex guy asked me sometime this week how I wound up doing this, told him I needed a job, they offered, and here I am.
I got a talking to  because my 30 minute lunch was only 28 because I can't remember what time I left, and I'm supposed to take an hour, but I was having a day so there we go.
It's been kinda like that. There are lots of rules, and I try to follow them, but still get in trouble when other people don't follow them so it's been a week.
I'm tired, but at least I'm not stressed. I don't care that much. At least as long as I have a job, I can move on if I need to, and right now I'm good because I'll get insurance next week so yay!
I can go get poked and prodded if the need arises, and it hasn't in a long time so it's just money I'm pissing away, but anyway. I need to throw some ice on my shoulders and sleep. Later kids.